You don't read me

Just posting random stuffs...

I finished my technique exams! Feel so relieved, but can't take a break now. The journey doesn't end here. I think I did quite okay, but could have been better. For ballet, I panicked as usual but got more comfortable after a few of the barre exercises. What I worried most was the La Fille Mal Gardee variation that I had to do at the end. Not my best performance, but I would put it in my top 5. Haha, "walk out... gold medal". =p I think only my classmates would know what that means. I didn't do as good for comtemporary exam, but overall still acceptable. Didn't screw up.... much. Was nervous and had shaky ankles, which didn't help one bit in turns. I can only hope to score more for my performance and progress in class throughout the semester.

Okay, so that's that. A little reflection about my technique exam.

Hmmm.... SYF. Yea, Riverside's modern dance GWH. Good job! Debbie's probably still bursting with joy now. Haha... Riverside chinese dance Gold. Well I guess most of them are disappointed, but a Gold's still a good result. It doesn't end here guys, still gotta keep at what you're doing. Anyway, actually 'O' Level's a lot more important. Haha. Glad First Toa Payoh got Gold too =) Dang, I didn't get to watch any of the dances this time round. Will try to grab hold of a DVD when it's out.

I know dance is a performing art. But one thing I realize about myself is that I hate to be judged.

Mild depression... In the midst of all that there is, in the midst of all that I care about, I've lost myself. I'm here, but I'm not anywhere. I'm alive yet I do not live to exist. What I'm trying to say is, I feel that I do not belong anywhere anymore. I look at the man in the mirror, and I do not know where he is standing.

The others have a life. Where is mine? If I look hard enough, I do have a life, however subtle it is. But no one cares about it. Who needs to anyway, I'm just... me. If only I spoke, if only you listened...

Not making anymore sense. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm me.