There are many things running through my head right now. Too many things. I'm never good at putting things down into words, but I'll try. Man that sounds so familiar, I probably wrote that before in a letter. Haha...
Let's see... Oh yea, I watched Feng Zhong Shao Lin with Mum and Dad at Esplanade last week. One word, DOPE. Haha, won't fill you guys on the details. The word says it all. :p
Choreographers Napoleon and Tabitha are dope. They choreographed a few items for SYTYCD season4. Their style is mostly lyrical hip hop. But I felt that they brought it a step furter. Emo hip hop. Wahaha... watching their choreography, it narrates, hand in hand with the song. It's not just about the tricks and being on beat. But the dancers were on beat of course. And I can see that they incorporate other so called non-hip hop movements, these help to express the chemistry between the two dancers in their duet. They're good... ... wow =p
Okay here's the boring section of this post zzz zzz. Me and my conflicts within. Still doing not so bad. Previously, I was working on being independent. Got better at it =) Yea,*pat my own back... I'm functioning well almost 24/7. Sadly, I still have signs and moments of breaking up when, well... you guys know, I assume. I'm still trying to think of a way to figure this out. Anyway, I still got tons of other flaws. Can't think straight now so I don't know what I should work on next. Gimme a few more days to ponder about it.
Sorry, can't put any more thoughts into words already. That's why I'm not a writer.
Right now, I feel so lost. But staying strong! Haha, go hard!
Crap, I'm not a Leo. I don't feel like a Leo.
Haha, peace y'all.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Not worth Reading... Ha
Don't really have something in mind to blog. Well here are just random stuffs and things that I did today. Well, technically it's yesterday...
Okay, I don't how to explain what I wanna say so nevermind. Here's what I did today(or yesterday :P)...
Today was a not so tiring but tiring day. Today was a not so productive yet productive day. Haha, I'm contradicting what I say :p But that's the best way I can think of to sum it up. Didn't do much in the morning, woke up and play PSP =/ I'm on holiday so it should be alright to play a lil bit right?
Late afternoon I made my way to Studio Wu. It's a long MRT trip zzz zzz... But not to worry, they're moving to a new place somewhere near SMU soon. That would be convenient. So anyway, monday's the most 'aggressive' day for me. Choing 3 classes straight. Haha, super workout. My shirt was heavy and wet by the start of the second class. Won't elaborate about the classes. One word. Dope. Haha... It's fun. I enjoy taking classes there, though it's very tiring sometimes. I realize most of the people there are older than me. Well there are people my age. But the 'old birds' are mostly in their 20s or reaching 20. I don't know all the peeps very well but they are nice people. Well, it's very different being there compared to being at huay kuan. What's different I don't know. Me I guess... And the way people see me is different. Now that's something to remember.
Haha, I realize I'm talking and typing more to myself rather than to you the reader. That's my failing in being unable to express myself and my thoughts. Gotta work on this some time. Dang, this post is just not worth reading. Sorry :p
Well see y'all. Peace.
Okay, I don't how to explain what I wanna say so nevermind. Here's what I did today(or yesterday :P)...
Today was a not so tiring but tiring day. Today was a not so productive yet productive day. Haha, I'm contradicting what I say :p But that's the best way I can think of to sum it up. Didn't do much in the morning, woke up and play PSP =/ I'm on holiday so it should be alright to play a lil bit right?
Late afternoon I made my way to Studio Wu. It's a long MRT trip zzz zzz... But not to worry, they're moving to a new place somewhere near SMU soon. That would be convenient. So anyway, monday's the most 'aggressive' day for me. Choing 3 classes straight. Haha, super workout. My shirt was heavy and wet by the start of the second class. Won't elaborate about the classes. One word. Dope. Haha... It's fun. I enjoy taking classes there, though it's very tiring sometimes. I realize most of the people there are older than me. Well there are people my age. But the 'old birds' are mostly in their 20s or reaching 20. I don't know all the peeps very well but they are nice people. Well, it's very different being there compared to being at huay kuan. What's different I don't know. Me I guess... And the way people see me is different. Now that's something to remember.
Haha, I realize I'm talking and typing more to myself rather than to you the reader. That's my failing in being unable to express myself and my thoughts. Gotta work on this some time. Dang, this post is just not worth reading. Sorry :p
Well see y'all. Peace.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Cold
Okay I woke up to a really bad start today. I did nothing much yesterday but as soon as I got home, I fell asleep zzz zzz. And I just happen to wake up 6plus in the morning. I laid in bed half awake and slept again soon after. 7plus I woke up again. 8plus I woke up again. Finally 10plus my mum called me up. Haha... I showered and ate breakfast. Had Mian Xian... Yup, mum says it's my dad's chinese birthday today. Hahaha, which means tomorrow's my chinese birthday! =P Really, I'm not kidding... :p
Yea, so after eating I just laid on the sofa listening to SPESHOW. And dang, I slept again. I'm typing all this now just moments after I woke up. :P
Okay, so it was a bad start coz I slept through almost half the day. What really made me feel so bad is the dreams I had(sound so kiddish!). I slept and woke up so many times that I dunno at which point I had which dream. But anyway, some were nice and some were just crap. But the last one really hit me bad. For one thing it was quite real. And it ended up the same as the previous so called "nightmares" that I've been having. I think it was around the time after dance camp then when I kept having those dreams. So why today too? -.-"
Maybe it's beacause I kept thinking that it would happen. Maybe because I really don't want something like that to ever happen. That's why this kind of situations keep playing inside my head when I sleep. Oh man, I'm so depressed. Hahaha... I miss everything so so much
Guess I won't be doing much today. I have problems helping the RS modern dancers. I don't know what to do. I'm not confident, that's why =(
My dog's scratching my leg coz she wants her lunch. Shouldn't have wore shorts; there's scratch marks all over my leg now. Gotta go give her her food before she starts barking like a mad dog... See y'all.
Peace.
Yea, so after eating I just laid on the sofa listening to SPESHOW. And dang, I slept again. I'm typing all this now just moments after I woke up. :P
Okay, so it was a bad start coz I slept through almost half the day. What really made me feel so bad is the dreams I had(sound so kiddish!). I slept and woke up so many times that I dunno at which point I had which dream. But anyway, some were nice and some were just crap. But the last one really hit me bad. For one thing it was quite real. And it ended up the same as the previous so called "nightmares" that I've been having. I think it was around the time after dance camp then when I kept having those dreams. So why today too? -.-"
Maybe it's beacause I kept thinking that it would happen. Maybe because I really don't want something like that to ever happen. That's why this kind of situations keep playing inside my head when I sleep. Oh man, I'm so depressed. Hahaha... I miss everything so so much
Guess I won't be doing much today. I have problems helping the RS modern dancers. I don't know what to do. I'm not confident, that's why =(
My dog's scratching my leg coz she wants her lunch. Shouldn't have wore shorts; there's scratch marks all over my leg now. Gotta go give her her food before she starts barking like a mad dog... See y'all.
Peace.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Not doing so Good.
Nothing much to say actually... coz nothing interesting happen. Haha...
I'm miserable most of the time I know. Lately I've expressing my misery too freely I suppose, in the form of sitting at one corner and insulting the people around me. Opps... Wrong move. (-_-)"
I once said that everyone has a choice and I choose to be the best of myself. I know myself better now and I really don't wanna be the person I see in the mirror now. It's not easy for me to do this on my own, but I'll try. My fears are drawing up upon me and I can't let them get me down.
Being confident isn't a good thing. Well being over confident isn't. Especially when it gets to your head. I see good people turn bad because of this. Like what people always say, too much of anything isn't good.
I guess anyone reading this boring post would be falling asleep soon. I don't have anything in particular that I wanna say actually. Yea, will update again when something worth writing pops up. Haha...
There's no use crying over spilled milk. But there wouldn't be anything to cry over if the milk was never there isn't it?
I'm miserable most of the time I know. Lately I've expressing my misery too freely I suppose, in the form of sitting at one corner and insulting the people around me. Opps... Wrong move. (-_-)"
I once said that everyone has a choice and I choose to be the best of myself. I know myself better now and I really don't wanna be the person I see in the mirror now. It's not easy for me to do this on my own, but I'll try. My fears are drawing up upon me and I can't let them get me down.
Being confident isn't a good thing. Well being over confident isn't. Especially when it gets to your head. I see good people turn bad because of this. Like what people always say, too much of anything isn't good.
I guess anyone reading this boring post would be falling asleep soon. I don't have anything in particular that I wanna say actually. Yea, will update again when something worth writing pops up. Haha...
There's no use crying over spilled milk. But there wouldn't be anything to cry over if the milk was never there isn't it?
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Take care...
*Sigh... It's been a while since the previous post. Can't say I've been better much. Well I think I got over most of that empty melancholic feeling, but I still ain't completely okay. Every now and then I still feel... sad. Well, it takes time to get better I guess. When dealing with all the conflicts within oneself, I learnt that everyone has a choice. I choose to be the best of myself =)
Alright, enough of this crazy depressed sh*t, here's some random stuffs... Haha
Been watching some videos on youtube. Dang, these dancers are dope! Rob Hoffman, Adam Servani, Travis Wall are crazy-a*s DOPE! Do look up on them on youtube if you guys have the time. Ummmmm, better not look up on them if you are easily offended, hahaha...
Somehow, I got the job of doing RS modern dance's open house item. Dang, I hope I can pull this off. It's not gonna be easy for me. Ain't cut out to do this kinda thing. I sucked big time when I did FTP's danceworks. Hope I'll do a better job on this. Gotta stay confident! (haha, all the useless self-encouragement :p)
The 3-person dance for August's performance is still in the making. Haha, hope it gets done asap, coz there's like what, just about 2 months left before showtime. I don't wanna screw this up too. Haha, my role in the item is a suffering victim, a D.I.D (damsel in distress), haha kidding. I'm a V.I.P (victim in pain).
Oh yea, watched Hancock today. It's a great movie. Humorous and action-packed at the same time. The storyline isn't pretty good though. A great movie to watch, especially when you're feeling =( with nothing better to do. The character John Hancock, proofed that you can change as long as you are willing to. You can change if you give yourself a chance. Yup, that sure helped a lot, if you know what I mean =p Haha... Peace y'all.
OMG, my dog just ate a lizard, which is so disgusting. She's never gonna lick my face again :P Now I know where all the pimples came from :p
Haha, that's all I could think of for now. Now that I think about it, I wonder who visits this page anyway. Maybe I should start writing more productive stuff instead of all these nonsense.... ... ... ... ... Nah. We'll see...
Hang in there. Please.
Alright, enough of this crazy depressed sh*t, here's some random stuffs... Haha
Been watching some videos on youtube. Dang, these dancers are dope! Rob Hoffman, Adam Servani, Travis Wall are crazy-a*s DOPE! Do look up on them on youtube if you guys have the time. Ummmmm, better not look up on them if you are easily offended, hahaha...
Somehow, I got the job of doing RS modern dance's open house item. Dang, I hope I can pull this off. It's not gonna be easy for me. Ain't cut out to do this kinda thing. I sucked big time when I did FTP's danceworks. Hope I'll do a better job on this. Gotta stay confident! (haha, all the useless self-encouragement :p)
The 3-person dance for August's performance is still in the making. Haha, hope it gets done asap, coz there's like what, just about 2 months left before showtime. I don't wanna screw this up too. Haha, my role in the item is a suffering victim, a D.I.D (damsel in distress), haha kidding. I'm a V.I.P (victim in pain).
Oh yea, watched Hancock today. It's a great movie. Humorous and action-packed at the same time. The storyline isn't pretty good though. A great movie to watch, especially when you're feeling =( with nothing better to do. The character John Hancock, proofed that you can change as long as you are willing to. You can change if you give yourself a chance. Yup, that sure helped a lot, if you know what I mean =p Haha... Peace y'all.
OMG, my dog just ate a lizard, which is so disgusting. She's never gonna lick my face again :P Now I know where all the pimples came from :p
Haha, that's all I could think of for now. Now that I think about it, I wonder who visits this page anyway. Maybe I should start writing more productive stuff instead of all these nonsense.... ... ... ... ... Nah. We'll see...
Hang in there. Please.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Half awake only
Oh I'm sick of torturing myself over all these problems which were never supposed to be there in the first place. It's just senseless. Crying over it is senseless. I'm just beating myself getting troubled over things like this. Now that I think about it, there was really nothing wrong.
The only thing wrong is the way I think things through, the way I see things, the way I perceive things. The only thing wrong right now is ME. Okay, now that we found where the problem lies, I can do something about it. Again. And again. And again.
All this while, all this time, I've been wanting to 改變自己 and once again, I proofed myself a failure. But it isn't all that bad, coz I honestly I feel that I'm becoming a better person. Yup, but just a little, not even an inch :p I understand myself a little better now. I just hope I didn't annoyed her too much this time.
Truth is, I've been expecting too much. That's why all these things that's happening or not happening are bothering me. There really was nothing much there in the first place. I wanted someone to care more about me, to care about what's happening to my life. I wanted to be someone that matter to someone. All this is too much to ask for. Even from friends and family. You can even say it's selfish to expect things like this. Okay, I know I'm a really dependent person (which is not a good thing) and I should try to be more self-reliable. So here's one of the points I can start to change; be more INDEPENDENT.
-"How could you expect yourself to take care of someone if you can't even take care of yourself?"
These words are coming back to haunt me again.
I just hope I haven't blew it completely this time. It just ain't the same without you here. I got rid of some of the emo-ness inside of me. I wanna be at peace with myself.
If I could go back, I wish I could have done things differently.
The only thing wrong is the way I think things through, the way I see things, the way I perceive things. The only thing wrong right now is ME. Okay, now that we found where the problem lies, I can do something about it. Again. And again. And again.
All this while, all this time, I've been wanting to 改變自己 and once again, I proofed myself a failure. But it isn't all that bad, coz I honestly I feel that I'm becoming a better person. Yup, but just a little, not even an inch :p I understand myself a little better now. I just hope I didn't annoyed her too much this time.
Truth is, I've been expecting too much. That's why all these things that's happening or not happening are bothering me. There really was nothing much there in the first place. I wanted someone to care more about me, to care about what's happening to my life. I wanted to be someone that matter to someone. All this is too much to ask for. Even from friends and family. You can even say it's selfish to expect things like this. Okay, I know I'm a really dependent person (which is not a good thing) and I should try to be more self-reliable. So here's one of the points I can start to change; be more INDEPENDENT.
-"How could you expect yourself to take care of someone if you can't even take care of yourself?"
These words are coming back to haunt me again.
I just hope I haven't blew it completely this time. It just ain't the same without you here. I got rid of some of the emo-ness inside of me. I wanna be at peace with myself.
If I could go back, I wish I could have done things differently.
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